Pointless Rants

C - Doesn't tell Jokes.
C++ - Will never tell a joke about objects.
C# - Tells jokes that only windows thinks is funny.
Java - Starts telling jokes but forgets the punchline.
Ruby - Never tells a joke the same way twice.
Perl - Tells jokes it doesn't understand anymore.
Python - Only tells peer reviewed jokes.
Objective C - Starts all jokes with NS.
Haskell - Tells Jokes that no one gets.
JavaScript - Tells jokes that aren't funny.
Jquery - Re-tells JavaScript's jokes so they're funny.
Clojure - Tells the punchline first.
PHP - Tells dirty jokes and then stops running.
MySQL - Can only tell jokes that it can find on it's indexes.
CSS - Only tells jokes that IE doesn't get.
CSS2 - Only tells jokes that IE doesn't get.
CSS3 - Only tells funnier jokes that IE doesn't get.
HTML - Tells you everything about the joke before it tells you the joke.
Django - Puts a new spin on old jokes you've heard before.
Rails - Tells one joke that's really funny but that's it.
Drupal - Calls in bomb threats.
NodeJS - Tells jokes that aren't funny on the server.

Post your language joke personalities!